Larry Long Jr. on Understanding Your Why and Core Values

Hey everyone, welcome back to Make It Happen Mondays, where we talk about sales, business, entrepreneurship, personal growth, mental health, and everything in between with guests who I truly respect and who I feel make a real positive impact on the world around us and talk about positive impact on the world around us. You are in for a treat here, ladies and gentlemen. My friend Larry Long Jr., who is the Chief Energy Officer at LLJR Enterprises and also keynote speaker, motivational speaker, and everything in between. If you've been paying attention to this podcast, Larry's been on it before and it's, you know, we talked about that positive energy. This time we got a little bit more specific and we saw, I mean, talk about a time where we all need some uplift here.

Larry and I talked about understanding your why and really going back to that right now and why it's so important to understand that so that we can power through this and core values and how that keeps us going through all this and helps us make decisions and how to stay positive through tough times. I mean, look, again, we're all going through tough times right now. How do you do that and kind of change your state so you can stay consistent? So if you don't come out of this one a little bit more motivated than you were about, I don't know what's going to motivate you. All right. So enjoy the show. What's happening, Make It Happen family. Big shout out to our partners today, Gong, Proposify, Vidyard, and Chili Piper.

Gong's data is more than valuable. It's cornerstone in any organization looking to collect the data that's going to tell them where they can improve and where they need to spend their time making changes. Proposify is one of my favorite teams of all time. What they do is they make the proposal and contract processes easy for the sender and the recipient. And who can't benefit from that being a great experience, right? Vidyard makes it easy for people to use videos anywhere. No matter whether you're sending videos in email or on social media, posting them somewhere or sending them in a DM, Vidyard has got you covered. Our friends at Chili Piper are so much fun to be around. They make it easy for people to get on your calendar.

And every sales rep has got to have this function locked in. It's one of the most important things we can do as a seller. How can I get you on my calendar easily? Chili Piper can make that happen for you. Be sure that you're checking out all these great tools. And now let's pass it over to John to find out who's joining him today. See you soon, everybody. All right, ladies and gentlemen, you are in for a treat right now. I am so excited to have my good friend. And I'm going to preface this with this. You know, I came into this new year relaunching my new podcast and I'm redoing my brand and everything. And I've decided that I only want to have conversations with people, not only who I respect, but bring positive energy to the world around us.

I am done with negative bullshit. I am done with all the drama. I only want to surround myself with good people and have those conversations. And there isn't anyone. I would rather have this conversation with my dear friend, Larry Long Jr. What's going on, brother? How are you doing? Come on, John. The feeling is mutual. You're making me blush. I ain't knowing you knew you can make a brother blush. I am so honored. I'm privileged. I'm happy to be here. Great to see you. Thank you. And like you, man. And I mean, look, we go back for people that don't know, you know, we're fellow UMDU Maryland grads here. We missed each other by a couple of years, man. I was 96. I was 94 to 98. You were 96 to 2000, right?

That's right. That's right. I'm sure we partied a little bit at some of those parties, but we might not. We didn't know each other back then, but we still got those roots. I love it. And now you're chief energy. I love it. CEO, right? But chief energy officer, right? And keynote speaker. Yeah, man. It's been great. It's been quite the journey. I'm building the plane as I'm flying it. Yeah, we all, right? There's been some turbulence, but hey, we're having fun every step of the way. And that's, you know what I mean? I think that, and that's where I want to start, man. Because I think that, you know, I think COVID, a lot of horrible things, right? But I think there's a lot of silver linings too.

And one of my hopes is, is that the silver lining, that it allowed people to take a step back and realize what's really important to them, right? And reshape some of their maybe core values and relook at things. And I want to start with you is with that really important question that everybody hits on that talks about, which is the why, right? And starting back. Because we're going to get into some coaching and what you're doing these days and what we're seeing out there to help people get motivated. But the why factor, you know, I sat down with Gary V about two or three years ago at a really critical point in my journey where it was a 4D session. I sat down with all his executives and then Gary came in and we did this like why exercise.

And I really started to hone in on that. And it was like, what's your why? And then what are your core values? And then what are your goals to help get those? So I'd love to start with yours. How, first of all, when did you start to really, first of all, what is your why, right? And I know what it is, but I want everybody else to hear it. And when did that start to solidify for you? And was it a conscious exercise that you sat down and did? Or was it something that evolved to something that you just knew? Yeah, it's great that you asked that. And I've got it on my board. Family first. People centric. Always do good. And then try your best. And for me, everything that I do is for my family. It's for my beautiful wife, for my two kids, for my father's legacy, my mom, my sister, my family, my friends who I consider family.

It's really to show them that, hey, I appreciate your support and I'm going to do the best that I possibly can. Now, I do a little priorities exercise, John, where I look at faith, family, friends, fun, fitness, because your health is your wealth. Finances, philanthropy, which I know it doesn't go with the F theme, but I spell phonetically. We went to Maryland, one state school, kids. And then career, and you rank them. So to answer your question, I've always kind of had my true north. It changed. Looking back at Maryland, it was a little bit different. My front was at the top, but it has evolved and I've gotten more intentional with time. Just realizing that if you don't put an intention out there, you kind of just go with the flow.

And I don't want to go with the flow. I want to live life with intention, with purpose, with focus, with discipline. And that's tough. Really tough. It really is. I mean, I think that discipline, right? And you say it like live with intention. That's why I hate the saying it is what it is. You know what I mean? I can't, like, look, yes, there are certain things you can't affect, right? It kind of is what it is. But to use that as a cop-out, I think a lot of people use that as a cop-out. Because it isn't what it is. You can change shit if you want to, right? You just got to be intentional about it. And you got to have a plan for it. So with that prioritization and restructuring, knowing that your true north is family and people around you and spreading positivity and stuff, how do you look at goals?

Because I've started to realize this. It's like, I talk a lot about goal setting, smart goal setting and, you know, five years out, what you want to look like and back into it and then get into the numbers on a day-to-day basis. But what I've realized about myself is I'm more of an evolutionist than I am a hard goal setter in the sense that I'm an opportunist, right? When things kind of... I do have kind of a guideline of where I want to be. But for me, it's like kind of like an ebb and flow and change. And I have this innate ability to be able to, you know, reshape on the fly, basically, what my goals are. But I know that's not really great because it is a visualization exercise. It is a write-down exercise.

It is accountability thing. So how do you look at goal setting? And how often do you revisit them? And what's your plan for that? Well, I got to tell you, John, you got to do what works for you. And believe you me, I've been kind of a fly by the seat of my pants type of guy. And what I realized is, hey, it worked for me in that time. Now I'm working with a coach and I'm just, we've gotten more focused where I've got my goals right here on my board that I'm looking at. And that's what I'm shooting for. And one of the things for me, it's allowed me to say no to things that in the past, I would say yes to. I would say yes to everything. Oh, purple squirrel. Yes. Blue squirrel. Yes. Now it's like purple squirrel.

Nope. That doesn't go with, with what I'm trying to accomplish here, here, and here. Sorry to say it, but no. And it's for me in this time, it's been great because even though I'm the chief energy officer, I'm also the real CEO and I'm running a business. I'm building a business and I've got some goals. You, you shared something with me earlier about what you've got going on. And I appreciate you sharing that working with my coach. I was able to uncover, I want to open up the shorty long. That was my dad, community center to support inner city youth. And I set a date, December 11th, 2025, his 10 year, the 10 year anniversary of his passing. I want to have either broken ground or have funds to be able to support inner city youth with higher education financially.

And that's my, that's why I'm no longer afraid to quote my fee. Whereas before, and it's crazy because I come from sales, but I was afraid to throw my fee out there just because it didn't feel right. I said, I'm helping people and I'm bopping them over the head, but no, it's a business. It's a business. So we're, we're trying to get after it and we're doing it with fun. We're doing it with purpose. And, uh, that's why I go, go, go every single day. Love that, man. You said December 11th, December 11th, 2025. I put the stake in the ground and that's what we're shooting for. I love it, man. Cause that's, I mean, I think that's the, it's, that's the key. I think about the goal setting is if to your point, if you don't have kind of a, somewhat of a North star, you, you end up saying yes to everything and it takes you away from a lot of stuff.

And I've started playing around with this whole concept. I put out, put together, um, kind of one of those charts, right. Where, you know, X axis, Y axis type of stuff. And I, and it, and instead of time management, Morgan and I talk a lot about energy management, right? Because time management is really, I think that's a little bit of a farce. To me, energy management is where I like, right? So we did this graph of like, um, high energy, low energy, like, I'm sorry, gives energy to you, takes energy away, uh, helps you achieve your goals, does not help you achieve your goals, right? So first you, you obviously start with the Y about like, what's your North star. Then you back into some of those goals about what you want to accomplish.

And then you write down all the stuff that you're doing, right? And you put it in one of those categories, right? So this gives me energy and it helps me achieve my goals. Like having a podcast, like one of my goals, right? My why is elevate the profession of sales, sales done right, elevate the profession of sales to the point where it's respected, where it should be. Right. And we got core values around that. And then one of them is, you know, is now I'm going off to my personal brand. I'm redoing my entire personal brand here. And we have some very specific metrics that we're going to look at as far as podcast growth, Instagram growth, those types of things. Okay. So that's, that's kind of the framework there.

Well, now an interview, a interview, a conversation with my good friend, Larry here gives me energy and helps me achieve my goals. So I will do this literally all day long. Right. But if it doesn't give you energy, but it still helps you achieve your goals, then you have to segment down and focus, right? So you compartmentalize that, you schedule two hours, eat the frog, whatever you want to do, you do that shit, right? Then there's the stuff that gives you energy, but doesn't help you achieve your goals. So it's positive energy, but it doesn't. Those are hobbies. Those are fun things. You've got to have that stuff, right? And then there's the shit that takes energy away and does not help you towards your goals.

And I tell people this, the number one thing you can do short term is figure out what that list is and stop doing all of it immediately, right? That's right. So it's like, it's this exercise where, you know, I think we're all on this journey of figuring this thing out. And so what are some, like, from your standpoint, what are your life lessons here? Because have you always been a positive cat? Like, have you always, did you come out like this? Yeah, we used to live in Grand Island, Nebraska, and I was younger. There's tornadoes there. So my mom always tells the story about little nappy-headed Larry. We lived in an apartment down in the basement when tornadoes are going on, and I'm running around jumping on people.

Everyone's fearful. We're going to die. And I'm just a happy-go-lucky. And I get that from my mom. I get that from my dad. My dad was an introvert. I grew up in Baltimore City, didn't really trust many people. But my mom, wide open, I get it from my mom. Yeah, yeah. That's the same with me. My dad was an introvert. He was an electrical engineer, didn't like to be around people. He always said, I love humanity. It's people I hate. That's what my dad's favorite line was. But my mom's the opposite, right? She's out there. She's a social butterfly, always trying to meet people, right? And so having that, I think that's a blessing that we were kind of born with a certain trait to stay positive in negative times.

But how do you develop that right now? Because I'm thinking about it right now. I look at my 11-year-old daughter, and I can't imagine what it's like to be an 11-year-old kid going through the shit that we're going through right now. But let's expand that to kids coming out of college and getting jobs. And we're now sitting in their house, sitting in their studio apartment, and Zoom fatigue, and all this other stuff, what are some things that you've learned along the way that have helped you stay positive through brutal times? Yeah, well, the most brutal is my father's passing. And I still hurt every single day. Me too. But what I realize is that I can control certain things. I can control how I feel about it.

Although I'm sad, I turn that sadness into positive energy to go out and help other people. There's a quote by Martin Luther King Jr. that says, life's most persistent and urgent question is, what are you doing to help others? So I ask myself that every day. Larry, not what are you thinking, not what are you writing down, but what are you going to do today to impact someone else for the positive? And I don't know if I told you this, John. I'm writing a book. And who would have thunk it? Larry Long Jr. writing a book? I love it. You were indeed rad writing a book, man. We didn't read shit in college. Now you're writing shit. It's so crazy. But the book has been therapy for me. I'm writing it for other people.

But I mean, the first chapter is, what story are you telling yourself and believing? And what I found is that tough people, which is all of us, are greater than tough times. And we've done it before. We'll do it again with resiliency. But also the key word is relationships. And it starts with your relationship with yourself and then your relationship with other people, but also with that purpose. You started with why. And I'm not the black Simon Sinek. I'm not even going to try to go there. But if you don't have a purpose, if you don't have a reason for being, that's tough. I mean, motivation, that's fleeting. Inspiration, that's fleeting. Transformation, I love it. How do we transform into having purpose every day where we go about our business with just that veracity?

I'm using words. I can't even spell that veracity. That's what I'm talking about, Willis. Yeah, I think that. And that's what I think it's important for the leaders out there right now. I've always said you can't get somebody if somebody's working for you, right? Because I used to get this all the time. Like, hey, John, you know, I'm working my ass off as a CEO and I hired, you know, 20, 30, 50 people, whatever it is. And they're just not as passionate, you know, that, you know, how do I get them to be as passionate? First of all, you're the business owner. You're never going to get them as passionate as you are. Okay, so stop trying that. But second of all, you're never going to get people to do more than what you ask them to do if they don't believe in a bigger cause, right?

If they don't believe in a vision, if they don't believe in a mission, they're just going to do their job, right? And so have you coached or worked with leaders right now to help really help them reset on their values and be able to translate those so other people can see it and buy into it and therefore help them grow? Yes. It starts with the leader. Once again, it starts with that person in the mirror. And essentially, your people are watching. It's kind of like kids. They're watching you. If you're telling me that I need to be grinding, but you're not grinding. If you're telling me I need balance, but you're not balanced. Once again, it's a contradiction. It's my kids check me all the time.

Hey, daddy, you tell me to get on technology. How come you're on your phone all day long? Touché, you got me. Do as I say and not as I do. That doesn't really work. Good luck. But yeah, in terms of leadership, it's really, it starts with you, but it also starts with each individual person that you're leading. You can't, I don't believe that you can find a cookie cutter way of leading individuals. Every individual is different. So how do you tap in to that individualism? You got the, for me, I had a rep, 800 square foot apartment. He said, Larry, I feel like the walls are caving in. He was pretty much crying out for help. I said, hey, we can't because of COVID, but we can talk. We can think about strategies to open that back up for you.

You got other folks that had newborn babies. Larry, I need some help. So it's really on the individual basis, the relationships and showing people that you care. We all say that we care. But like my wife said, hey, baby, you say you love me. Go ahead and fold those clothes to just show me how much you love me. Show me what you're working with. Exactly. And that's where it's those little things, right? That, that, that prove it. Not that that's why, for instance, like I can't stay on Valentine's day. I think it's a joke. When I met my wife, the first time I told her, I go, I will buy you flowers 364 days a year. But that fifth one, that one day that I have to spend five times more on roses just to prove that I love you is bullshit.

It's the same thing like birthdays on Facebook is like, oh, do I have to actually post everybody how much I love my wife on her birthday on Facebook just to show you? No, I'm going to show you every day by showing up. And I'm wondering from yours, like, I mean, you got stories for days here. What, what are your, what are some, what, what's one of your favorite kind of mental turnaround stories that you've been a part of? Like where you saw somebody, they were struggling and, and, and whether you worked with them or somebody else worked with them and, and they turned it around and it made a difference. Like what's one of your favorite ones? It doesn't have to be necessarily you working with them, but you know, what, what's some of your favorites?

My, my man, Manon in Australia. What's up, Manon? I see you, dog. We went through the prioritization. He said family first. He supports his family in India finances next because he supports his family in India. And then fitness number three. I said, Hey, open up your calendar. I want to see your workout. It was like a deer in the headlights. He was like, Oh, Houston, we have a problem. I said, Hey, it's all good, man. No judgment zone, but let's open up your calendar Monday afternoon, 12 to 1230. Let's schedule a workout. Copy me on the invite. I'm gonna hold you accountable. And when you get done, send me a selfie. It was Sunday night at 1030 our time. It was Australia time, Monday, 1230. He sends me a sweaty selfie.

He was like, Hey, I kept my promise. Thank you for making me. My wife was like, what kind of coaching are you doing? I said, you see what happened, baby? It ain't like that. But I said, I didn't make you do it, but you told me that that was your number three priority. If your time, energy, and resources aren't being dedicated, it's not really your number three priority. I got another one real quick. Rewind back to University of Maryland. I'm playing baseball freshman year. I start off my career one for my first 24. It doesn't take a math major to know that'll get you playing the position I left out. Go to the end of the bench because whatever you have might be contagious. I remember talking to my dad after we played UNC Greensboro down here in North Carolina.

And he said, how you feeling, Lil Larry? I said, I feel terrible, Pops. I don't belong in Division I. I definitely don't belong in the ACC. I'm dating myself. That was when Maryland was in the ACC. I know. That's why, by the way, sidebar, that's when I stopped watching. When the ACC broke up and they messed up all the districts, like all the conferences, I stopped. Because I was like, the ACC was the baller best conference. Anyways, we could talk about that for a whole other podcast. That's right. So my dad jumped through that phone. And he was like, Lil Larry, you can't have my name with a stank-ass attitude. Pardon my French. With a stank-ass attitude like that, that's not how we roll. He said, you got to get back to the drawing board.

And like Allen Iverson said, we're talking about practice. You got to get your reps. But more importantly, you got to get your mind right. You've got a defeated mindset going up there talking about, I hope I don't strike out. I hope I don't strike. Well, I struck out. He was like, no, you got to come in with a positive attitude that can only be developed from practicing, from working on your game. Carolina came to town. I got a blue pit. I'm like Kanye West. You can't tell me nothing. I'm on top of the world. Ended up batting 289, 319 in the ACC my freshman year. That was all she wrote, John. Love it. I love it. And you're right. I mean, unless related to the day-to-days that we work with kids.

Like I see kids going into a podcast or dumps for a podcast, into a call blitz, right? And they're like, oh, this is going to suck. I'm like, yep. You just predetermined this entire thing is going to suck. You might as well not go on this call blitz right now. You know what I mean? And it's either you're in or you're out. It's one of those things that my old, one of my old CEOs who is my age, but, but he, he said like, when you go to the gym, right? So many people do this where they know they got to go to the gym, right? So, all right, I got to go to the gym, but then they don't go to the gym that day for whatever reason. And then they sit down at home and feel bad about the fact that they didn't go to the gym.

And what he was, what he says is, look, you either go to the gym or you don't. Don't sit home and feel bad about it because that's the negative. That's a double negative right there. Sit home, eat your pint of ice cream, like enjoy your movie and then go to the gym tomorrow. But don't sit there and be like, oh, woe is me. I'm eating ice cream. I'm a fat ass. Cause I don't go into the gym and feel bad about yourself and not go to the gym. And so I think that to your point of that mentality, um, is critical to change that state, like the Tony Robbins, right? Like you got to figure it out. And one of the biggest, coolest changes I heard a while back was with athletes. Let's go to the athletes. Right.

And, and what I forget what that might've been Simon Sinek, but he said that, uh, you know, instead of being nervous, the mentality is I'm excited. That's right. Right. Cause I, you and I've been up on stage before we, we stand up in front of keynotes. Right. And I'm sure there's been times when you're like, oh man, like my palms are sweating. Like, I don't want to fuck, you know, I'm Eminem right here. Like you got one chance, right? That type of thing. And, uh, and all of a sudden, but if you switch that to, no, I'm excited to have this conversation now, all of a sudden that's a mental nervous is a defensive play. Excited is an offensive play. That's right. That's right. I love it. That mindset and your perspective is so important.

And I don't know. I love to go back to the quote by Henry Ford, whether you believe you can, or whether you believe you can't, you're right. And it really, I know you mentioned smart goals. I'm a, I'm a flip the script. I'm going to say, nah, I want them to be specific. I want them to be measurable. I don't want attainable or realistic goals. They got to be time, time bound. And John, I'm, I'm living the dream right now. I'm living a life that I never would have expected. And it comes from my coach challenging me. She said, Hey, it's kind of like that Kobe Bryant mamba mentality. There's low performers, average performers, high performers. No, Larry, we're going for meta performance. You might be good, but let's get great.

You might be great. Let's be Mr. Wonderful. Let's get to that next level. And she's challenging me. And it's crazy because when you put it out there, the human being, the human spirit, it finds a way. And I'm achieving stuff that I never would have thunk. I never would have imagined that my family's going to Spain in the summertime where I'm working a little bit, golfing a lot, working on my tan on the beach. And my family's going to get to travel. Like if you would have told me that, I would have said, shut your mouth. I'll have what you're drinking. That's mission impossible. But I'm living that life because I'm challenging myself. And I've got support. I'm not, it's not like I'm doing it alone.

I'm, I'm not that smart. I'm not that good. But when you got a support team that believes in you, and when you start to believe in yourself, I would say the sky's the limit, but there is no limit. There really isn't any limit. What's up, everybody? I know you're enjoying this conversation. John does a great job with genuine curiosity on these episodes. And our guests consistently bring the heat. We want to take a moment here and let you know that you've got an opportunity, an opportunity to become better than you were yesterday. And you can do so by gaining access to all of JB Sales' content. All of their training tips, techniques, tactics, and takeaways can be yours for $1 a day. $365 for the year gets you annual access to everything, including our private Slack channel for members only, which you get access to all of us directly 100% of the time, 24 hours a day.

And then at the same time, you're going to get access to our biweekly Ask Me Anything sessions, where you can bring real deals to the table and get the help that you need where you need it. This is very, very important. Sales reps that invest in themselves are often found at the tops of their leaderboards. Join us today and get the help you need to become the seller that you deserve to be. That URL, one more time, is joinjbsales.com. Let's get back to the show with JB and our guest for this week. I will tell you, I've been struggling with that a little bit as far as the greatness factor, right? It's like, you know, that's why sometimes I actually get demotivated sometimes by watching people who are at the pinnacle of it.

I'll give you a quick example. So Drift, I think what it was, had their sales, had their kickoff, their event, whatever it was. And they had that dude that climbed the mountain, that scaled that rock without any harnesses, super, I don't know, they made a movie about him. I forget his name, whatever it was. But the dude was up there and he was talking about his regiment, about how he lived in a van and how he ate, you know, nothing all day. And he was a very introverted person, like definitely had some, you know, on the spectrum type of stuff. But he reached the absolute pinnacle, right? And I'm sitting there listening to his story and I'm like, dude, I'm sorry, no matter how hard I try at anything in my life, there is not a fucking shot in hell that I'm going to be able to achieve something like that, right?

I mean, that is beyond ridiculous what the dude did. So in some ways it's a little demotivating. So there's this balance of, and this is where I want to push on you a little bit. There is a balance of being somewhat realistic and then just overly optimistic, right? Because I'll give you a quick, like when I, and I don't ever want to do this, but in my head, this is what happens. When somebody says to me, they want to change the world, right? Whatever that means for them. And it's a big lofty like thing. Part of me says, good for you, man. Go for it. Make it, fucking make it happen, right? The other part of me says, how big does it set you to then eventually become a demotivator because you're not seeing, you're not, you're not, it's not even close to realistic.

So how do you balance that, right? Like I want to get, like Simon Sinek has one. He wants every single person in the world to live a life that is fulfilled and whatever his why is, okay? With that, I think you could say, hey, I'm chipping away at it. You know what I mean? Because the more people I see, the more people I'm changing, that type of thing. But with like something like, you know, I want to stop pollution. I want to stop, you know, climate change, something like that. Like where does it become self-defeating in some ways? Because you know it's not, you ultimately know in your soul that it's not attainable. Like how do you balance that? Yeah, I mean, the work that I'm doing with my coach, now there are limits.

I mean, for me to say I'm going to Pluto, come on, Larry, let's, let's keep it real. But hold on, let's use that as an example. Like look at Elon Musk. That motherfucker says, I'm going to Mars. That motherfucker's going to Mars. Like he was like, fuck everything, right? But, and he's, but he has the means and the mentality and the ability to do it. You know what I mean? Like he is all in on that stuff. So you think, oh, going to Mars, you're crazy. But that dude's going to Mars. So how does that relate to us though, with those huge aspirations that we have? Because I, I, I fear, I fear that. I fear about setting too big aspirations and not even coming close to them. And then judging myself on that versus the day-to-day impact I'm actually having.

Yeah, I hear you on that, but I'm going to challenge you. And I appreciate you pushing back on it because it's like me saying, I'm going to the NBA. I'm, it ain't going to happen. I'm not spunky, man. It ain't going to happen. But essentially there's so many times that we limit ourselves. And I was the example. I set my goals and my coach said, are you shitting me? She was like, are you crazy? You can do that by yourself. You're working with me. Let's get right here and let's shoot for the moon. If you miss, you're going to be amongst the stars. But it is, I can understand where, when you said it's so lofty, you could be demotivated. But that's where it comes back to you understanding that the process, you've got to learn through the process.

And you said it earlier, chipping away. You're chipping away at it. And essentially, if you can get to above where you had started, that's still a win. So you've got to celebrate successes. And I just set a little mini goal. You know that I'm Tiger Woods' long lost cousin. Larry hit it in the woods. So essentially, I set a goal for myself that if I hit, I'm going to try to scout tickets to the Masters. I'm going to drop it like it's high, a little bit of loot. But essentially, it's like, hey, if I hit this mini goal, I'm going to reward myself. So you're right on the balance. But I'm also going to say that people have greatness inside them. And a lot of times, we lose it. And we don't realize and we don't believe in that inner greatness because of past experiences.

Oh, I didn't. For me, my business failed before. I can't go out on business again. I'm going to put my family in the poorhouse. Survey says, nah, that was that. This is this. You've got to believe in yourself. And right now, it's beyond anything that I would have imagined. I think everyone can attain that. I agree. And that's also, I think your environment creates that too, right? Because I read the kind of the Cliff Notes version of it, but like rich dad, poor dad, right? And there's a reason that rich kids are, rich dads produce rich kids is because they see it. There's no limitations to it. And so they don't think it's a, it's like, oh, yeah, I can do that. I got my dad and all his friends and my mom and all her friends can do it.

So I can do it. Whereas poor dad, no, not like, no, you have to, you know, you have to do this. You're stuck in this box over here. So you don't, excuse me, you don't even get exposed to the potential. And when you do get exposed to the potential, it's like, wait a minute. I mean, like, I don't know. Do you have, let me ask you this. Do you have imposter syndrome? All the time. I've got FUD, fear, uncertainty, and doubt. Not Elmer FUD, but it walks in my head every day in terms of, am I good enough? Who do I think I am with this little gold mic talking to people? Am I worthy? Every day, John. Yeah, I do too. And that's where, but what's funny to me is, going back to your comment about limiting, you know, beliefs here, a quick story.

And I can't say to the person because I don't want to embarrass them. But I was doing a pod, I was doing a, no, it was a podcast. And usually I prep, right? I'll go through the notes and, you know, kind of jot down some stuff. Like, I got all my stuff here for you, right? But this time I didn't have any time, right? And so whatever, I was like, all right, fine. I'll just get on. I'm a decent person figuring out how to figure out where this conversation goes. But like two minutes before I got on, I opened it up. And when I tell you, it was the second in command of a $40 billion company that we all know. And I saw his title and I was like, and it was C-O, right? And I'm like, oh my God. I'm like, I didn't prepare for this.

I'm a state school kid here that drank my way through college. And I'm about to interview this dude, right? But what was funny is every time that happens to me and I get put in that situation, within about five minutes into that situation, I'm like, oh, still, wait a minute. Like, yeah, I belong here. Like, I can have this conversation because they're full of shit in a lot of ways or whatever it is. But it takes that putting yourself in that position. And I worry that not enough people are being put in that position to realize that greatness. So for people who are out there who don't have the good role models, who don't have that rich dad that they can look at as a model, what do you, like, how do you break those limiting?

Like, who do you, who do you suggest they associate themselves with? What do they do to start to break that limiting mentality that they might have? Like mine, you know what I mean? Like, I don't think I can change the world. I can change, I can change it one little piece at a time, which I think effectively, you know, macro changes it, but I do have limiting beliefs of like, ah, you know, like, is it really that, you know, am I really that good? Or can I really get that big? So what's the, what's the process you go through to break through that? Well, first of all, you are changed in the world, whether you know it or not. And each individual that you impact and individuals that you're impacting then impacts others.

So you're doing it for those that are out there. There's so many resources at our disposal today. I mean, my best friend is Google. My next best friend is YouTube. You can find anything and everything. And you said it best. You can't be what you can't see, which is why I want to help inner city youth see someone that looks like them. That's been through a similar journey, have success and excellence, but there's so much out there. You've got to seek it proactively, whether it's mentorship, whether it's many mentors, whether it's resources that are out there, you put together the daggone Netflix for sales. If you want to be a top-notch sales performer, it's there. There's no excuse. So, I mean, it's out there.

My question is, do you really want it? I used to own a baseball academy. I used to hear from the kids. Oh, Coach Larry, I want to play varsity. No, you don't. Because if you did, you would work on your swing outside of practice. Yes, Alan. We're talking about practice. You would work on your game. There's nothing holding you back. I have a presentation with a group out of the UK. I'm getting choked up because I'm going to ask them, what's holding you back from accomplishing your big goal? And I already know the answer. I should be a lawyer. It's the person in the mirror. We can come up with excuse. I've got an excuse for every day that ends in Y, John. But essentially, we've got to say, no more excuses.

Let's get it done. Let's believe in ourselves, which is a lot easier said than done. But let me get my crew. I know you've got your squad, you've got your A-team that's supporting you, uplifting you, and really challenging you. You're better than that, John. Let's get it. You are changing the world. Let's do it even more. Let's do it even bigger and better. Let's go. Yeah, and it's funny. There's one person I really don't like in our spaces, Grant Cardone. But he has that 10x mentality of take whatever that goal is and multiply it by 10 and then go get it. And some of the best sales professionals I've come across, like I remember I was doing Salesforce's kickoff a while back, you know, it was in Vegas.

And Benioff brought up the top three sales reps of the, you know, of the year, right? And he asked, hey, when you get your quarter, what happens? What do you do? And they say immediately double it, immediately triple it, immediately 10x it, right? Because I set that goal and you had said it, you should, you know, shoot for the moon, but settle on the star. Well, shoot for the stars, settle on the moon or whatever, right? And that's what they do. So they might not hit that extra goal that they put, but they'll absolutely crush their existing one. And I think there's a lot of cheat codes and things that we can use to trick our mentality, to reshape our mentality, whether it's writing things down or having other people call us to hold us accountable or, you know, whatever it might be to really break through that limiting belief barrier.

Yep. Well, John, you got it on your shirt, make it happen. And I was part of Team Maryland, a group of student athletes. We would talk to elementary, middle, and high school. And our model was only you can make it happen because it starts with you. Now, it doesn't end with you. You need supporters and team and resources. But if you don't have that initial gumption, if you don't have that initial internal belief in your heart, and I can tell you that my heart sometimes tells me you're going the wrong way. Don't do it. You're not worthy. But you got it. It starts with you, with the heart, with the head, with the words you say. And then that dictates your actions. What are you actually doing? What are your habits?

What are your beliefs? What are your actions? And it's so simple in concept, in theory, but in execution, oh, it's so difficult. And that's why you see such a small percentage that are actually attaining the great success. Well, and that's, so that's why I kind of sat, like, I've always had a little bit of a hard time with motivational speakers. And I'm going to put this in context. I don't have the problem with the motivational speaker. My, and I don't want to say problem's a bad word, but it's, it's, my issue with it is that so many people need it. So Tony Robbins, I don't need, I don't need, I'm a pretty self-motivated person. I do, I have my friends and I have my process of how I get motivated, right?

But he, millions of people go to his shit on a regular basis and they keep going to his shit. And you had said something earlier about motivation versus inspiration. My take on motivation versus inspiration is inspiration is external, motivation is internal, right? So somebody else can inspire you to do something, but unless you're internally motivated to do it, you'll never do it, right? So if we think of Tony Robbins and, you know, like the, the hot coals that everybody used to walk across, right? Well, until everybody burnt their feet off and he had to stop doing it, but, um, but like you're sitting there and you're like, I would never run across those coals, like limiting belief, like that would burn my feet, right?

That's ridiculous. But then you go to one of Tony Robbins sessions, right? And you, you get his big ass head in your face, yelling at you. You get a thousand people saying you can do it. You can do it. You can do it. Right. And you run across those coals and you're like, holy shit, Tony Robbins, you are a genius, right? Thank you, God. Oh my God. Now the question though, is, is next week when those coals are there and those 5,000 people ain't cheering your name and his big ass head isn't in your face, yelling at you, are you going to run across those coals? And the problem is, is that I see the majority of people won't. That's right. So A, why do you think that is? I mean, I have this bad, and I wish I didn't have this mentality, but I believe in the 80 20 rule across the board.

And I believe that 80% of the people in this world are sheep and they're looking for somebody else to tell them what to do. And there's 20% that drive. And that's being generous in my opinion. So of those 80%, like where's, there's always a group you're never going to be able to reach. That's right. Right. But where's, how do you reach the group that's there and it's inside them? And I think, I agree with you. I think it's inside of all of us, but I think it's inside more of us than others. Right. How do you tap into that? So it's consistent. Cause you, you had said something with one more piece. You had said something earlier with you, like your, your, your motivational Wednesday or something like that with your C's, like your wife had a commitment.

I think no consistency. You had commitment. You're right. She had consistency and your daughter had companionship. So like the consistency piece here, how do you wake up every day and not need somebody yelling at you to, to get you out of bed? And that's, that's tough to have that discipline. And, uh, I think it's Rory Vaden, take the stairs, talks about human nature and humans at the nature. Want to want to be engineers. We want to do the least amount of work with the biggest return. And folks are lazy. Like, I mean, there's not everyone, but there's folks that are lazy that just don't want to do the work. It's tough. I mean, I look at, I'm just looking internal. I used to take a hundred swings Monday through Friday.

My friends were at the ice skating rink at the mall on Friday. I had to take my hundred swings because I wanted to play varsity as a freshman. That was commitment. That was discipline. It was sacrifice. A lot of folks aren't built for tough and they're not built to do that or they don't want to. And that's the great thing is that free will. It's a choice. You can be intentional and make that choice. The, the tough decision you, you, we talked about eating right, the discipline to eat right. I know I'm not supposed to eat fried chicken, but you asked me what time it is. It's bow time. Well, my doctor said, you're going to die earlier than you would if you keep eating bow time. So I've made a conscious choice that I'm going to mix in a salad with grilled chicken.

So I don't have the magic wand, John, to be able to reach those folks. But for the folks that are listening, I challenge you to find that internal discipline, to find and reach out for the external assistance to help you stay along the way. Because we all know what we should be doing for the most part. We all know what we shouldn't be doing, but doing that, that's a whole different ball game. A whole different story. Yeah. That's a, you know, I call it the give a shit factor, right? Morgan and I talk about this a lot and you've probably heard me say this. Like he came to me and was like, Hey John, my results, like when he first started working here, you know, he was doing his thing. We came up with messaging and his numbers were decent.

Right. But then they plateaued and he came to me and he said, John, I'm, I'm, I'm a little worried. I feel like I'm doing all the right stuff and I'm not seeing the results. And I said, Morgan, he's like, so what do I need to do? I go, Morgan, nothing's going to change about your results until something does internally. And he goes, what? I said, until you start giving a shit, man. And he was like, wait, what? I'm like, look, I know you give a shit about your job. I know you give a shit about, you know, working here and all that other stuff. But until you genuinely start giving a shit about the other person on the other end of the phone or the end of that end of that email, your results aren't going to change.

And so giving, getting to the give a shit factor is, is a real hard thing. And I'm dealing with my daughter right now. Like, she's struggling with a couple of things as far as her school. And I was like, what's, what's, something's missing here, sweetheart. And she's like, and she came to me the other day and she said, daddy, do you think I have a learning disability? And I was like, no, I think you have a give a shit disability. That's right. Because every time I've seen her apply herself to something she cares about, she's great at it. But when she doesn't care about it, she doesn't care about it. And therefore it doesn't go through. I'm like, so sweetheart, we got to figure out a ways to tap into.

And look, there's not always like school, don't get me wrong. I, you know, I'm not, I wasn't a big school kid. You know what I mean? And there was stuff that I was like, I don't want to do this. But there was, there was at least a few things that I, I latched into and hooked onto because I cared. And I think that's the, that's the, the fear I have right now of what's happening from a macroeconomic standpoint, right? You and I grew up with, without technology, we're, we're Gen Xers, right? So we were told to figure shit out. We weren't babied, right? We, we kind of, we were latchkey kids, right? TVs and stuff like that. Whereas this whole crew coming out is, you know, I mean, holy smokes, they've had everything given to them in a lot of ways.

I'm making very broad generalizations here, but there, there is a lack of give a shit. There is a shortcut mentality that I'm starting to see seep in. And I feel like my dad talking about this because I feel like an old man, but I feel like it's realer now than it ever has been. And, and are you seeing that? Cause you just went to some colleges, right? And, and what are you, what, what's the vibe you're getting in these colleges that you're speaking to in these kids that they're coming? Is it an optimistic one? Is it a give a shit factor one, or is it a lackadaisical one? You talked about the 80, 20 and once again, being generous. It's not, life is tough. I mean, it's a four letter word. It always has been tough.

It always will be tough. But once again, it comes down to the people. And like you said, do you give a damn? Do you actually care? Do you care about yourself? Because if you do, you're going to do certain things. Do you care about other people? People can smell BS from a mile away. If you don't really care about them, good luck having success in anything because relationships drive it. So the vibe on college campuses is similar to the vibe in society. And they asked me to speak. The one university said, can you speak about people being nice to each other? I said, what? Being nice to each other? They said, yeah, all sense of civility. People are just being nasty to each other. And it's a shame because society, we see that people just being nasty with each other.

We're all part of the human race. And once again, Martin Luther King Jr., so many before us have had this dream that we could all get together. Because you think about it, for the most part, we all have similar goals. We want our families to thrive, to be healthy, to be happy. And it's that common ground that seems to be lost. It's just like, why? Why are we doing this instead of this? And once again, I want to have an impact in the space that I have to be able to share a new perspective. And it's not really a new perspective. It's an old perspective. But let's revisit that old perspective. And let's see if we can start putting it in a place of being nice. You talked earlier, and it hit me hard.

I call it the hashtag three-minute challenge. Every day, you take three minutes, find one person in your Rolodex. That's not the watch. I can't even spell that. But one person in your contact list. And you just do something to surprise and delight them. You let them know, hey, I care about you. I'm thinking about you. Nothing but love for you, baby. It goes a long way. Those little things are really the big things. And I think that's the takeaway I had a while back when it came to doing the change of state thing, like the Tony Robbins, is when, I mean, life's a lot about momentum, right? Positive or negative. When things are going good, they seem to be going good. And they snowball. And all of a sudden, you start hitting shit.

And it's like, whoa, this is fantastic, right? But when things are going bad, they tend to unravel real fast and compound on each other. So what you've got to do is exactly what you said. You've got to stop and start looking at the little things like what, you know, I did this exercise and people have heard this podcast before they've heard me say this is, is, you know, I had a good friend of mine who was struggling and she was in a really bad spot. Everything in her mind was negative, right? And I told her, I go, do me a favor. And it was the gratitude journal idea. I was like, do me a favor. Take this notebook. And I want tomorrow, because it was, I was like, tomorrow, I want you to literally write down every small thing that is, that happens to you positive today.

And I don't care how small it is, by the way. If you hit a green light on your way to work, write it down. Somebody opens the door for you, write it down. You get a text from a friend, write it down. Right. And she was like, all right. She's like, why? I was like, just humor me here. Right. She came back at the end of that day with like four straight pages of notes. And she's like, John, today was one of the best days I've ever had in my life. And I was like, can I ask you, do you think I had anything to do with that? And she, cause she thanked me and she was like, this is, you know, and I was like, I'm like, I'm going to tell you right now, I had zero to do with that because it was in front of you.

You just weren't looking for it. And you got to celebrate those small wins right now. And that's why I'm back to gratitude journals and writing things down every day that I'm thankful for, because you can easily get caught in all that negative shit without being pro. I am trying, I am personally forcing productivity, forcing positivity right now. I'm forcing it because I refuse to allow this shit to weigh on me as much as it could. That's right. I love it. I love it. The company you keep, the environment you're in, if you're surrounded by negative Nancy's, negative Nellie's, chances are you're going to be negative. And you talked about that momentum, the energy is either going to be positive or negative.

And for me, I, I proactively try to stay positive. Does that mean that bad stuff doesn't happen to me? Bad stuff happens to me all the time. I mean, but it's just my buddy, Jamie Babb, James Babb. He said, he came to my team. He said, Hey, in every situation, I challenge you to find the good, the great, and the wonderful. And we had just gotten hidden with a snowstorm in, you know, North Carolina, we don't know how to act with snow. You don't deal with that well. You don't deal with that well. Yeah. One of my reps, Nathan, he, uh, he ran off, ran off the road, got stuck in a snowbank. He said, the good is that I had exercise. He had to walk a mile. He said, the great was he got a good night's sleep in a hotel.

And then he was like, the wonderful, I didn't have my wife or my dog kicking me at night. He was like, James message was spot on because yes, I could have been. Oh, it's me. Life is terrible. FML. But instead he was like the good, the great and the wonderful. And that's really in any situation that we encounter. Yeah. I love it, man. I think that's, I think that's needed now more than ever. You know what I mean? I really do think that, that, you know, those little things, the pay it forward stuff, right. Buying somebody coffee behind you. Like, I love those types of stories, right. Where you just, you know, it's, you know, random acts of kindness. If you can do that, we can combat a lot of this bullshit.

And the last thing I'll say, because I think this brings it full circle is you said that, you know, how we're all just yelling at each other and arguing right now. Right. And you know why I think that is, I think it's goes back to the core values conversation. I think it used to mean something. Now I'm going to take this from a white man's perspective. Right. And this is so it, you know, in general for, uh, for, for white men, it was like, okay, the world worked a certain way. And there was a core value there. Now there's all sorts of problems that we had back when we shared core values. Don't get me wrong. That's why I positioned that as, as a white male who was very privileged. Right. Um, but there was a sense of core values.

Like if you remember, um, like nine 11, right. When nine 11 happened, man, like, I don't care if you were black, white, brown, yellow. I don't care if you were a Scientologist. I don't care if you were Jewish or Catholic or whatever. It didn't matter. We were Americans and we were like, man, we are together. You saw each other in the street and you nodded your head just like that. Like, we'll get through this together. Right. Because if you ask both sides, any side there, there'd be a sense of like, yeah, these are our core values. And now I think you ask whatever side and you're going to come up with vastly different definitions. Even though we all have the, you said, and we all have the core fundamental bit, like family, just enjoying it like that type of stuff.

So we all do share that. But for some reason we've lost that core of, of what it means to live in this country. And that's why I think we're just yelling at each other. And I'm, and I'm worried that it, that it's, that it's past the point of no return, but I think we can do it by spreading those little mini positivities and, and just trying to create that snowball back in the right direction. Yeah. There's definitely hope out there. And John, I got to tell you, man, you're, you're doing it and I appreciate you. I don't, I don't know if I've ever told you, but thank you for all that you do for me, for, for the community, elevating sales as a profession. You're doing it. You've been doing it. You're going to keep doing it.

And I just hope, you know, that I'm appreciative and so many others are. So I, I want to give you your flowers while you're here. Thanks brother. I appreciate this more than, you know, um, like I said, there's, there's, uh, I decided this year to force positivity. I decided this year to only surround myself with people that I admire and, and bring positive energy to my life. And you are absolutely one of those Larry. So I appreciate everything you do, brother. That means so much. Thank you so much, John, JB. Absolutely. And look, just to, just to give, I mean, we'll put all your stuff in there, but where do you want people to go? Is it LinkedIn? Is it like you'd speak in like your website? LinkedIn is the best place to, uh, to connect with me.

Smile for a mile. Got the gold mic. Got the, uh, the, the platinum mic also known as pink. Close enough. Yeah. So by the way, if anybody ever, I say all this all the time, like if anybody needs like a, a, just a shot of energy for their team, like Larry all day long, if anybody needs to a host for a webinar is, is my boy James all day long. Cause he keeps it hype. So if you're looking for positivity out there, don't look too far. Cause you got it in front of you here. So, uh, Larry, again, thanks to everything. And I think you'll appreciate this more than most. When I say this, you know, at the end of all my podcasts, I always say the same thing, right? No matter how bad your day is, you could have the worst day ever, but if you go out there and make somebody smile today, you know, you had a good day, right?

Cause then the world needs a lot more of that. So thank you for everything you are and everything you do there. I appreciate it. Thank you, John. Peace. Peace. Thank you so much for your time today and listening to the podcast. I hope you enjoyed the conversation as much as I did with your support and our incredible guests. We're one of the top sales podcasts in the industry with over a million downloads. And I can't thank you enough to keep the momentum going. If you could go to your favorite podcast platform and leave us a five-star review, I would greatly appreciate it. In return, I will answer any question that you have on Instagram. Hit me up there at John M as in Michael Barrows with a video question or a DM, and I will get right back to you.

I promise. And last but not least, if you're looking for training, I'm adjusting my training approach this year, and I'm actually going to be delivering training to the masses. I'll be delivering live training the first and second week of every single month with our two marquee courses, filling the funnel and driving a close to anybody who wants to join. And it includes membership in our on-demand platform with weekly AMAs. So you can go to jbarrows.com slash open to check out the details. Thanks again and have a great day.